My mother and a few siblings overcoming their past.
Family stories are important in sharing bonds with each other and imparting family history. But for children, appreciating family stories actually increases their self-esteem. Since kids learn from our stories, it’s important to write them down while we can. And as truthfully as we can.
From small details to larger stories, my mother’s sister revised history.
“Mother and Father?” muttered my mom after my aunt shared a story about their parents. “They were Ma and Pa in our family.”
Suddenly, gone were the lean years. My grandfather never drank. All was rosy in their past lives.
Why do families change their stories?
“It sounds better,” said my mom, of her sister’s tales. “But it’s not true.”
“Mom,” I assured her. “It wasn’t your fault you were poor and your pa was an alcoholic.”
Understanding why people act the way they do gives more layers of meanings to family stories. But for families sharing a legacy, the Pollyanna picture rather than grim reality is easier for them to face and they won’t have to fear possible judgement.
Actually sharing the less-than-picture-perfect tales are vital for family members. We learn from longings, wishes, and regrets. Cautionary tales show how to learn and move beyond mistakes, sorrows, and tragedies. People grow from these experiences and strengthen bonds perhaps more than through the happy, contented moments in our lives.
“There’s nothing to writing,” said author Red Smith. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and open a vein.”
Writing Prompts:
- Write about your life from the moment of your first memories. Use photos to jog your memory.
- What was going on in the world during the time? Your community? Neighborhood? You may begin your stories chronologically, but you don’t have to stick to this format. What moments in your life were emotional for you? Why? Your favorite moments, scary times, funny anecdotes, and tragedies all should be explored.
- Interview others in your life as you grew up. What is their take on the experiences you shared together?
- Listen to music of the time. Remember the foods you ate. Senses help us to recall our thoughts and actions.